"Use me, Lord."
That is my prayer....it has been for a while now. And I mean it. For the last 3 months, I've been quieter, seeking Christ at every turn and trying to really listen for Him. And He's been so clear. He's given me opportunity after opportunity to let Him shine through me. Because that's ultimately what it's all about. I want to be that drink offering I learned about it Sown so many months ago. I want to be so full of Christ that it pours out onto other people. I want His Perfect Peace in me.
I joked around with Laura (founder of Sown) a couple of weeks. I told her, "I said to God 'use me,' but I didn't mean ALL of me!" But that's how God has decided to work. He's been giving me opportunities to speak with dear friends about challenges they're facing. He allowed me to practice immediate obedience in a situation where I, as a selfish human, could have ignored Him and done what I wanted to do. He's spoken through me to a group of women that are desperate to stain their lives with God's truth. It's truly beautiful. He's allowing me to become a mentor to a woman who, in turn, is going to mentor someone else! He's given me the gift of watching a woman finally understand what that peace is God gives to us and the moment when we realize He'll take any burden for us....if we really let go of it. He answered my prayer in a different way when I found out that I'll still have to pay money back that I didn't know I owed. I prayed for grace on that one....He gave grace a different way. (He'll reveal that one to me eventually, I'm sure!) All of this has been in the last 4 weeks or so!
At one point, I felt so stretched thin, but every time I've felt so weary and thought "Really, God? How are You going to use this?", He's shown me some blessing or an A-HA moment that makes me say, "Ok....You got this!"
Now, I say....BRING IT ON. I'll do whatever it is He asks. I'll take whatever He wants me to take. Because I'm SURE if I handle it with Christ as my foundation, it will bring Him honor. If I seek Him in every situation, it will bring Him glory. If I keep focused on His love and mercy, it will bring Him praise.
I can't wait to see what God has in store for me next. Because if it's anything like it's been in the last 4 weeks, He's just getting warmed up!
