The Weight of Worry

Worry.

It's been a big word in my life for a long time.  I've always been the kind of person that worried about everything...from homework to kids to relationships.  And yesterday, God decided to deal with it. 

This last week in my Bible study homework, there was a lot of talk about worrying and trusting God.  Laura always speaks at the beginning of SOWN for about 1/2 hour and gives a lesson on the previous week's homework, and boy, if I didn't think God was working on me through the homework, He definitely showed up in the lesson when Laura was speaking.  These are some of the verses she gave:

Proverbs 12:25 -Anxiety in a man's heart weights it down, But a good word makes it glad.
Philippians 4:6 -Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your request be made known to God.

Worrying can be such a huge stumbling block.  It takes my focus off God and what He can and DOES provide for me and puts it on myself and what I can do.  And really, what can I do about it?  Nothing.  Worry costs me so much.  It robs me from enjoying the present.  The "what-if" scenarios that play in my head are torturous.  And Laura said something last night that hit me like a brick...."Even if the worst of the worst what-ifs plays out, God is still God, He's still here and He's not leaving."

I've struggled with this as I've begun a new relationship with Jeremy.  I worry if I'm doing the right thing.  I worry if I'm being overbearing or not attentive enough.  I worry how my children are being affected.  I worry about being hurt again.  But the fact is, God is in the middle of it and He knows what I need.  He has chosen to bless me with a Christian man who's kind and considerate, a man who prays about his decisions before he makes them.  Someone who cares about the fragileness of my daughters and taking the time to get to know them without pushing them.  A person who sees the little things I try to do to show him I care, and acknowledges it...he lets me know it doesn't go unnoticed. 

I'm constantly taking this relationship to God.  I thank Him for what I went through in the past to get me where I am in my relationship today, but when I'm still worrying about it, I'm not letting God have total control.  I'm praying for things in this relationship that to some, might seem trivial and not worth praying about, but if God says to take everything to Him in prayer and supplication (petitioning to God), doesn't it stand to reason that everything can be affected by prayer?!  Even my trivial things. 

After last night, I am confident that I'm heading in the right direction with my petitions to God regarding Jeremy and where God has me going in this venture.  I'm confident that God will lead me if I let Him.  And I know that I have to stop worrying about it.  I don't want to be robbed of my present.  I want to enjoy it.  I want to live it.  I want to feel it and I want to feel God's presence in the middle of it!  I want to live life through Christ without the weight of worry.

What worry is weighing you down?