God has taken me on the most amazing journey this week.
In fact, so many things are running through my head that God has laid on me, you'll have to forgive me if I ramble. I'm probably going to bullet point it....THAT'S how excited I am!!!!
1. I started my Bible Study, SOWN, at church this last Tuesday. We are doing a ten week study of Philippians and already, I'm getting so much out of it. The biggest thing probably isn't even anything about Philippians, either. (I love how God takes something and transforms it for you into something so magnificent and special!) "God reveals Himself to us all the time, but it's up to us what we choose to do with that revelation"....this was written in the study and I was so taken by it. I wonder how many times God has shown me something and I choose to do things my own way because (to me) it's safe, when really, how much safer can you be than in doing what God has revealed for you to do?! This was huge for me.
2. How many times do we feel that Biblical knowledge translates to a strong walk with God and being a good spiritual leader? This came up in a conversation with some dear friends and it also really made me stop and reflect. I think that Biblical knowledge is important. I love that I know and have memorized verses from the Bible and I know a lot of Bible stories, because I think it's important to share those with my children. It shows them that I'm studying or have studied God's Word. But what about the Christian who is spiritually bankrupt (another great one I got from by Bible study!)? A person can know the Bible inside and out and being withering on the inside, not watering their spiritual garden.
This is how I was for years. I was saved when I was young. I memorized the verses and stories but when it came to having a walk with God, it was all talk. I could witness with the best of them, but if you had turned my body inside out and had seen my heart, you would've seen the Holy Spirit weeping because He was TRYING to speak to me and I had my earplugs in. With a FAITHFUL walk, the Bible knowledge comes. It may take time, but as long as you go to God, "I'm coming to you with a willing heart," and let Him take over, He will give to you the knowledge that you need to follow and trust Him. And showing your family that change of heart and your desire to follow Christ is quite possibly one of the greatest gifts you can give your family as a spiritual leader. God gave a husband his wife and a wife her husband to not only love each other, but also to help each other grow in grace and truth, following God's plan. One of the greatest things I can give to my future husband is my willingness to come along side him and nurture his desire to walk with God.
3. I began reading The Shack after several years of people telling me to pick it up and it has blown me away. Something in particular I read struck me so hard, it brought tears to my eyes. In the book Jesus challenges Mack with this question, "Do you live in the past, the present or the future?"
And I stopped. Such a small question. And I began to cry. I live in the past and the future. I live hanging on sometimes to the things that make me feel comfortable and secure. And I definitely am living in the future. As Shawn can attest, I'm constantly thinking about what needs to be done to strengthen our relationship and build my family and, in general, trying to figure the future out. But why do I do that?
Jesus said in the book, "It is your desperate attempt to get some control over something you can't. It is impossible for you to take power over the future because it isn't even real, nor will it ever be real. You try and play God, imagining the evil that you fear becoming reality, and then you try and make plans and contingencies to avoid what you fear....but when I dwell with you, I do so in the present--I live in the present."
Wow.....it makes me think about how even though I feel my walk with God is strong, how much stronger can it really be if I stop trying to create my future or hold on to my past and just rest in God....in the present? I want HIM to mold my future and I want to trust His design for me.
Have any of you had something rock you so hard, it made you stop like that and question "How much do I really trust in You, Lord?"
Such good thoughts, Erin. That book has come up so many times for me lately - in conversation, FB posts, and now your blog... I really want to read it (though I hear the subject matter is really difficult).
ReplyDeleteI just finished reading Crazy Love by Frances Chan and it REALLY, really challenged me in some of these same ways. And I seemed to be already working through some of these issues lately as it was. God really seems to be speaking lately! Thanks for sharing, Erin!